


My Only Hate

by reigningqueenofwords



Series: Violent Desires Meet Violent Ends [5]
Category: The Walking Dead
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-16
Updated: 2019-07-16
Packaged: 2020-06-29 20:12:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,417
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19837699
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/reigningqueenofwords/pseuds/reigningqueenofwords





	My Only Hate

Waking up, your head was on Negan’s chest, his arm around your shoulders. You smiled up at him, enjoying how normal this felt. He smirked down at you, amused. “See somethin’ you like, sweetheart?”

You shrugged. “I might.” Grinning, you leaned up and kissed him softly. “Y/N.” You told him. He shifted, looking at you with furrowed brows. “You don’t have to tell me your name right now. I do like calling you the mystery man to my friends, but I wanted you to have mine.”

Surprisingly, he grinned at you. A full on, honest, joyful grin. He cupped your cheek and rolled the two of you so that he was over you. His brown eyes were locked on you Y/E/C eyes, both full of want and need for the other. His thumb brushed your bottom lip before he caught your lips with his. 

Nothing more needed to be said, he showed you what he felt for you. You didn’t need his name right then, you didn’t need some sweet words, all you needed was him. Gripping his shoulders as he rolled his hips into yours, your eyes fluttered shut. His scruff rubbed against your neck, leaving the perfect burn in it’s wake. You felt his teeth barely brush against your skin as a low groan escaped him. “Oh…” You gasped.

“I love those sounds you make, sweetheart.” He panted, holding you tight to himself.

* * *

Neither of you rushed to leave that morning, not wanting to part ways. “Come back with me.” He smiled at you.

“I’d love that, but I do have things I need to do at home. Soon, though.” You leaned up, kissing him with your hand on his cheek. “Let me sort things out to make sure that things are taken care of.”

He chuckled. “Alright. Be safe.” That took you by surprise, as that wasn’t anything that he’d normally say to you. However, you could tell that he meant it. You saw the truth in his eyes, and smiled at him. “Until next time.”

* * *

On your way back to Alexandria, you froze. His words echoed in your mind. ‘Be safe.’ Your heart was racing. You’d been sleeping with him for a few months now- and neither of you had thought of being safe. “I’m over thinking things. That’s it.” You muttered to yourself, slowly you forced yourself to move forward.

You’d get back, and you’d talk to Maggie. She’d tell you that you were just being silly. After all, you felt fine, so there was nothing to stress about. “Fuck.” You took off running towards home, not wanting to be stuck trapped in your own thoughts outside the walls of Alexandria.

Skidding to a halt, your hands came to a rest on your knees as the gate opened. You didn’t see who was there, nor did you care. As soon as you could, you slipped in and ran through the streets to see Maggie.

Seeing an RV, Rick talking to Eugene next to it, you stood back a bit, your lungs burning. When he watched Eugene get in, you made your way up to him. “What’s going on?” You asked, finally catching your breath.

“We’re taking Maggie to Hilltop. She needs a doctor.” His blue eyes studied you. “You okay?”

“J-just out of breath.” Your eyes were on the RV. “I’m going.” Looking back at him, you saw him about to protest. “You know I’m her friend, Rick. And I’m good with knives. I don’t take up much space, and I have stuff in my bag, so you don’t have to worry about me eating.”

He waved his hand. “Get in there.” He sighed. You gave him a quick hug, and soon your worries for yourself melted into worry for Maggie and the baby.

You saw her and gave her a sad smile. “Hey, sweetie.” Your voice was soft as you sat on the floor next to her. Her hand was in yours, a comforting touch for her. Now and then you’d give her some water, not wanting to get dehydrated.

* * *

Stopping, you glanced over your shoulder, but didn’t move. You weren’t leaving Maggie’s side. Everyone else exited the RV, though, leaving just the two of you. You could hear voices, but not what they were saying. Rick was the last one standing outside, and you heard him clear as day. “You wanna make today your last day on Earth?” You couldn’t imagine him saying that to just anyone, either.

Moments after he’d gotten back in, the RV was on the road again. You’d crawled behind Maggie, gently running your fingers through her hair, the rocking putting you to sleep. You felt her grab your hand, holding it against her ribs. “I’m here, Mags.” You reassured her, mumbling in your sleep.

Maggie had quickly become like your sister when you’d met her and the others. Both her, and Beth. It had killed both of you when you saw Daryl carry her in his arms, and held on to each other. Rosita was your best friend, Maggie was your family.

* * *

The sound of gunshots jerked you from your nap, making your heart race. Slipping out of bed gently, you brushed the bangs back from Maggie’s forehead. Part of you wanted to go out and help, but you couldn’t leave her. Finally, everyone rushed back onto the RV. Rick was holding what looked like Michonne’s hair, and your stomach dropped.

You could hear Eugene and Sasha talking about directions, and where everyone was headed. Someone was trying to stop you from getting her help. Leaning forward, you kissed her forehead gently, your worry growing. She was burning up, which was never a good sign.

* * *

The sun had set, and the darkness seemed to engulf every shred of hope that you could possibly feel. Maggie was loaded onto a stretcher, and you would all travel by foot. Through the woods- where there were an abundance of walkers. Carl led the way, whipping through walkers like it was nothing. Rick carried the front, Abraham in the back.

Hearing whistling, everyone stopped. It sounded familiar, but you just couldn’t place it. You shook it off as you all moved quickly. Headlights blinded you for a moment, and you were surrounded by men. A few dozen, at least? You couldn’t tell. All you knew was this wasn’t good.

You were shaking slightly, your fears for Maggie now twisting into the fears you’d had earlier about yourself. “Good, you made it. Welcome to where you’re going.” Your hand went to your stomach- your mind crazy with what ifs. Hell, you’d never even thought of it until he told you to be safe. What if you died here, would he ever know? What if you survived, how long until he held you again? What if you died never knowing if you were carrying his child? What if you died never knowing the man that you loved? So many thoughts swirling together, clouding your mind.

While Rick spoke, your eyes were staring at one spot on the ground. One by one, your weapons were taken. When he mentioned getting Maggie down, your eyes watered, your gaze looking towards her. Your heart clenched at the sight of her. As the others moved to their knees, you followed suit. 

Glenn was soon on his knees with the group, along with Daryl, and Rosita. No one dared look as the RV door opened, except you. “Pissin’ our pants yet?” Your eyes went wide. There was no way that this was the same man that was holding you just that morning. Was everything a lie? Was the man that you loved the same man standing before you- Negan- threatening your friends.

His voice was like a low humming in your ear, as you felt dizzy. You swayed slightly as you tried to keep from falling over. It didn’t matter what he was saying to Rick. He was looking towards the other side of the line from where you were, talking about his men, and all of you working for him now.

Finally, you were able to focus. “And I’m gonna beat the holy hell out of one you. Now this is Lucille.” His voice got low, his eyes scanning the line. Either he didn’t see you, or didn’t care. Your heart was breaking as the moments ticked by. He moved towards Carl, and finally spotted you. “Holy fuckin’ hell.” He breathed, and you couldn’t read the look on his face. “Y/N.”


End file.
